20 things adopted children wished thier adoptive parents knew

I always feel so guilty that I don't blog much and its not because I don't like to its just that I don't have time AND I don't know how to post pictures on here. Hopefully one of these days I can get Britton to help me.
Last year when we were in Destin Florida we went to a Barnes and Noble book store. I asked the lady there where there section on adoption was. She looked at me and said, "Are you all adopting?" And at the time we had just sent in our application to CWA. And of course we said YES :) She went on to tell us that she herself was adopted from America. Her and her husband had been trying for 5 years to have a baby and they were adopting a little girl from China! Such a great "God moment"! We bonded right then and there and talked with her for at least an hour! She printed off ALL the books they had on adoption just in case we ever wanted to buy more.
My Mom got me one of the books for Christmas this year and I just finished reading it. SO good! I was so blessed to read it. I would love to share it with you if your adopting and want to read it. This book is called, "Twenty things adopted kids wish their adoptive parents knew" written by Sherrie Eldridge

1. I suffered a profound loss before I was adopted and You are not responsible
2. I need to be taught that I have special needs arising from adoption loss, of which I need not be ashamed
3. If I don't grieve my loss, my ability to receive love from you and others will be hindered
   
4. My unresolved grief may surface in anger toward you
5. I need your help in grieving my loss. Teach me how to get in touch with my feelings about my adoption and then validate them
6. Just because I don't talk about my birth family does not mean I don't think about them
7. I want you to take the initiative in opening conversations about my birth family
8. I need to know the truth about my conception, birth and family history, no matter how painful the details will be
9. I am afraid I was 'given away' by my birth mother because I was a bad baby. I need you to help me dump my toxic shame
10. I am afraid you will abandon me
11. I may appear more 'whole' than I actually am. I need your help to uncover the parts of myself that I keep hidden so I can integrate all the elements of my identity
12. I need to gain a sense of personal power
13. Please don't say I look or act like you. I need you to acknowledge and celebrate our differences
    
14. Let me be my own person...but don't let me cut myself off from you
15. Please respect my privacy regarding my adoption. Don't tell other people without my consent
16. Birthdays may be difficult for me
17. Not knowing my full medical history can be distressing at times
18. I am afraid I will be to much for you to handle
19. When I act out my fears in obnoxious ways, please hang in there with me and respond wisely
20. Even if I decide to search for my birth family, I will always want you to be my parents